*AS E DEY HOT
OYA HIT Me
1. When I was a kid, Pussy means Cat, Sex
means Gender, DICK was a name, And Bang
was a sound, Whats happening to this
Generation?
2. You drank garri twice today, buy #100
recharge card and get 10mb, came on
Facebook and wrote ''Money no be problem'
Ur case dey court
3. You dey owe mama ikenna #50 and and
you dey wear ''My money grow like grass T-
shirt''
Wehdone sir!
4. You fit pay #5000 enter club but for
church na #20 be your offering
God is watching you o
5. You're too big to dance in church but you
go gaga crazy when you hear the (gbedu
wey dey burst brain)
God dey watch you too o
6. You're married but still chases other
ladies and you claim you're going for
refresher courses
Your cup go soon full
7. Just because you met him in a bus and he
bought you gala, you cum store his name as
''Bros gala''
Sista tank you o
8. You're an O'level holder but you sponsor
your girl for university
My broda, you be scholarship board?
9. You dey inside hotel room snap picture
come upload and write ''Home Sweet
Home''
Your Mata Dey God's Hand
10. You enter public transport #600 to go
shoprite go snap picture with other
people's goods,
Abeg wetin i wan tell you?''
11. Do you know that 90% of Girls Urinate
On Their Body While Bathing ?
12. Dangote did not send 'I love you Jesus to
25
people before he get rich' please stop
disturbing
me or else I will curse ooo
13. NEPA is the Major cause of unwanted
Pregnancy in Nigeria
Everythng starts when she Enters the Room
to Charge Her Phone
14. Salary 20k, Phone 400k, Weavon 30k.
And you go to church to ask God for a
Miracle, When you are already Performing
magic
15. If You Were Ask To Collect N1,000.
From All Your EX How Much Will You Get
As For Me I Will Get N53k
16. I overheard a girl talking to her BF,
initially I thought she was talking to God,
because the things she asked for only God
can provide them
17. When the devil fails to destroy you, it
sends you a girlfriend from MBA_ISE
18. Plz Know your priorities and spend your
money wisely. Don't go and buy selfie stick
when your armpit really needs a shaving
stick.
19. Marriage is like jamb
You will be admiring UniBen & UNN buh last
last end up in OmoPoly
20. Don't ever insult or challenge d woman
who cook ur food bcos #20 can buy Rat
Poison.
My hands no dy ooo
21. For Those Of You Who Went To Private
School And Are Intelligent, What Is The Past
Tense Of GOtv?
22. Some have bae but can not cheat .Some
can cheat but have no bae . I have bae and i
can la la la what do yu want 2 hear? Amebo
23. Guys plz if u are dating my future WIFE
plz take it easy on her, don't make her shout
words like harder, don't stop, ride on
24. Condoms are for weak ass men, real
men fuck quickly & pull out before HIV
notices.
25. Some chicks be like:"I can't cook my
mom didn't teach me babe."
Now tell me,who taught you doggystyle
hehh??
26. Why do Ladies with Gap Teeth Always
Apologize Like.
"Baby I'm Thorry , It Vont Hapfen Again."?
27. It's only African parents dat will advice
you for 6hours & still tell you "I don't have
much to say"..
28. After having sex with many guyz some
girls we still call that area private part, for ur sweet 16 court wears
information is not private but public.
29. I am done with breaking people's heart
Am now focusing on the spinal cord
30. It's only in Nigeria movies that you will
see an angel with a tribal mark
31. After what Ramos did to salah, I now
understand why RAMS are killed during
SALAH # UCL fans
32. True love is when you wear your
Girlfriend's underwear to show Other girls
that you are already taken.
34. Some be dating an ugly girl & be lyk
anoda man's food is anoda man's poison,
my frnd poison na poison ntin lyk anoda
man food
35. She is nt good in bed
She is nt good in bed
Ma brother hv u try d table, chair or floor,
she must b good SOMWIE.
36. Some Ladies On Facebook They Look
Like Beyonce. In Real Life,they Look Like
Mugabe.
37. Ladiesī
Pls Try as Much as Possible to Look Like the
Person on ur Profile Pic.
This is the 10th Time my Cousin is Waisting
Transport
38. U came to kidnap me with a G-Wagon
and u expect me to shout. Abeg shift make I
balance well.
39. Cigarettes and weed are for small boys,
real men smoke mosquito coil
40. If you're too happy in a relationship, just
know you're the Side Chic. Main Chics don't
usually have peace of mind.
41. I have never seen someone having heart
beat than a guy who impregnate a soldier
daughter.
He'll start chewing water, end up drinking
rice
42. Guys, whatever you do in this life, don't
offend your village people
My neighbour won 500k from bet9ja and
his girlfriend washed it with his trousers.
43. Child of God and you still have sex with
condom
Isn't God's protection enough for you?
44. This days, Davido's girlfriend trend more
than some nigerian artist. When last you
hear from TerryG?
45. This is Nigeria where girls borrow make-
up and dress just to visit a guy who borrow
room from his friend.
Too much Confusion and Transmissions
46. Since i was born and now i am getting
old, I've never seen the wife of a president
pregnant.
Brothers and sister have you seen?
47. Some girls will plait their hair and their
forehead will be shining as if their brain is
using solar energy.
Lemme mind my business sef.
48. Men are like BLUETOOTH CONNECTION.
When you're beside them, they stay
connected. But when you're away they
search for NEW DEVICES.
49. How Chinese people choose their kids
name. Very simple! Just throw their pot or
pans down the stairs and listen to sound,
''Ding-Ping-Wong-Chung-Feng''.
50. Don't trust a girl who doesn't use her
father's name on social media. If she can
deny her father, my brother who're you?
You wey go read this my post, you no go
comment,
My dear, you get leprosy for hand?
You read my post, you no credit me. Abeg na
wetin u
# gain